Professional Women’s Football Player heals spontaneously using Intuition!
How one woman’s subconscious cycle of self-inflicted, perpetual, self-abuse healed overnight setting her free and as CEO & Founder of a movement called Intuitive Human
This is why I am an Intuitive Human.
That was me, 25… just starting my career 3 yrs prior, traveling anywhere my company required and on their dime. Jet-setter, systems engineer, ambitious. Working 70–100hrs per week… eat/sleep, work, travel, annnnnnd FOOTBALL for chicks! Legit, NFL-style, tackle football. That was my life in Jacksonville, Florida.
I heard through a good friend late on a Friday night, try-outs were the next day! Any sport and especially contact sports, say when and I’m there! No thought required. I tried out and made it! Wow!
Wait, I’m a … what?
Professional Women’s Football Player
WAFL — Women’s American Football League
Inaugural Season, 2001–2002
Jersey #70
for the Jacksonville Dixie Blues!!
Once in a lifetime opportunity.
12–16 hours of practice weekly after work was secretly and steadily increasing the girth of my neck-size was a bit more than I bargained for. With a history of powder-puff football, softball, basketball, track&field (shotput/discus), volleyball, pretty much any sport (never soccer)… and achieving black belt in martial arts by age 16, still, somehow that neck thing blows my mind.
Learning how “flippers” are used to break through the defensive line, helmets taking out knees, mouth-guards, shoulder pads, tailbone & hip pads, doo-rags… the whole sha-bang. Including peeling the white and blue uniform off, then any Under Armour, unwrapping myself from ace-bandages over my cleats, to unveiling the instant black and blue welts that showed up immediately from the days glory. Some were sooo black I didn’t realize bruising could get that black. Or be as big as dinner plates across my body. Ah, just another day, I’m used to it.
I pulled out my right shoulder a bit on an epic QB sack! E.P.I.C. Kept playing. I had also experienced what I later learned was a concussion or series of them, when I was finding it hard to remember simple words or appointments while working. I also experienced long lasting deep, knotty, contusions on the sides of my biceps for years after the season ended.
Growing up in a military household in the South where rules were strict, yes ma’am/no ma’am, and yes sir/no sirs, were mandatory… asking permission to leave the dinner table, being grounded for any ol’ unintended action, deliberate actions too. And when things didn’t go right, us kids got the back end of whatever was near. It eventually got bad enough that the CPS / Child Protective Services removed us from the home and all the legal proceedings ensued. I share that vaguely on purpose because it’s not what this story is really about, but it helps to make sense of the choices I continued to make for myself well beyond my parents divorce and living with a single mom.
Unsupervised each day, mom was always gone working however many jobs she couldn’t keep and chain-smoking with her buddies at the local VFW hall. They never hit us again after that bout when I was 8… I took that charge on myself. Thank you legal system.
Did I mention, my dad was trained by Golden Gloves boxing champs as a teen, and retired 20 years in the military… so he taught us to fight back, always. I was always in fights as a child and in school. Physical fights with boys and girls, it didn’t matter much. Pushed, ganged up on, bit on my arm (still have the scar), shoved, you name it year after year. At my age 5, I even swung and hit a boy upside his 5yr old head with a baseball bat …because he wouldn’t get off my big-wheel.
By the 6th grade I was playing sports in school, 7th grade was the only Caucasian girl on the basketball team, still fighting, 8th grade started martial arts, played softball at school, loved P.E., rode my bike everywhere, 9th grade excelling at martial arts, going 5 days a week, stopped fighting outside of my dojo… 10th grade achieving blackbelt, teaching folks from age 5–55… now combat, I mean contact sports was my jam. 11th and 12th grade still involved in martial arts every waking moment, as well as powder-puff football as a senior. Flag football my booty… contact sport all the way, don’t lie!
I “conditioned” my shins by striking them almost daily with a short metal baton over and over and over again, so that I could numb out my shins to be able to guard myself without pain. Oxymoron much? Making sure to hit the bone, not the meaty muscle. “Let them hit that instead of the sensitive inner belly,” they said. Much better. No surprise that by age 25 I had graduated to NFL style football, for women.
Now…
Something was about to happen on a routine business trip that I never saw coming.
About 3 months after we won our division and lost the nationals, I was in Atlanta, GA for software implementation meetings all week with a client. I arrive to my hotel in Georgia late at night for work the next day and the electrical transformer blows on the entire block. It’s pitch black, I just arrived, midnight, and feeling freaked out, so I head to the lobby to wait and see what’s shakin’.
There I meet two women, who were in town for some “healing” training. Now, healing, I have no idea what that even means, so I inquire with them about it. Eventually coming to a better understanding that they are in town to learn the emotional aspects of the bio-meridian stress testing machine. This device uses frequencies or electromagnetic signals, software, and a brass stylus with a small brass wired cylinder … to measure health in the physical and emotional bodies. Look it up, you’ll find something similar under Asyra too.
How it works is you hold the brass cylinder in one hand and the facilitator uses the brass stylist to “poke” you in a singular location as she moves through the protocol on the software. This singular pokey place is precisely where your middle finger when bent down into your palm lands naturally.
I agree to a session with these two women’s teacher. An abundance of serendipitous alignment was being orchestrated beyond myself, universally. I could feel it. Something different was happening here and upon me.
I arrive to the appointment and am sitting in a chair, in an office, after hours, that’s a part of a chiropractor’s office. Nobody there but me and this average looking, middle aged, teacher of bio-meridian testing, Jessica. She patiently informs me how it all works, which I already knew because the lobby ladies, Sally and Caroline, showed me the physical testing on this machine days prior. I know the scoop. Or at least I thought I did.
So we proceed with the test… for our 1hr appt.
She informs me that we will be testing the emotional health of my body system and starts the stylus contacting my palm, calibrates the machine, and proceeds through the protocol. Beeps are happening, high pitch, low pitch, medium pitch while red, green, or yellow markers are appearing with each pass of the signals into my body.
It’s accurate. Weirdly so.
Her computer thingy is picking up areas of legit, deep emotional strife in my life. How is that?
We come upon some exercises called “Fill Your Vessel” & “The Storm”. She closes down the lid of her computer, removes the brass cylinder from my left hand, quits poking me with the stylus in my right hand… removes the lap-desk I had my arms resting on and it’s just me, in a chair, in front of her, in her office. It’s dark outside, we’re about 45mins now into the 1hr session. And she explains this exercise to me… the goal is to fill my vessel. Asks me to find a “positive anchor” which I have NO clue what she means and finally with coaching I’m able to secure a positive anchor, for safety, in my mind. The last bit she mentions is that I will have a physical reaction and I would know what it is when it shows up.
Ummmm OK?????
Jessica starts off whatever this vessel exercise is with taking me through a beach scene. Asking me to close my eyes, relax, take some deep breaths while starting to notice the wind blowing… and then the tropical heat, how that feels on my skin… if I’m wearing a bathing suit or can I hear the seagulls or the ocean waves crashing on the shore…
And
I have to be honest, I was confused kinda.
Like what is this? What am I supposed to be doing? Am I with you on this beach, or just me, or what beach, where? What time of day is it? Who’s telling the story here?
And she keeps talking with her scene creation process while I’m supposed to be experiencing what she’s saying AS she’s saying it? How is that possible? I didn’t get it, at all.
So now I’m supposed to be in the water…feeling the water on the top of my foot… or … something. Shoot lady, I’m still up here on the shore, cuz I don’t like sand and I’m confused. And at least I mentally “carved out” my arms and legs and chest cavity with a melon baller thing so I can have an “empty vessel” to fill up. But I’m not with you out there, in here.
The second I acknowledged that in myself, before I knew it, I was in a hall of corridors, all white, very long, with closed white doors every few feet. Only the door knobs and the half windows on the doors were not white.
Jessica is still talking about the beach. And now she’s using some unusual language that I never heard… “you are joy”, “you are kind”, “you are happy”… and I’m thinking, what are you saying? I am ____, not I can have ___, or I can achieve ____, rather I am ____? What does that even meeeeeeaaaaaaannnnnn? I wondered.
I’m still in there exploring my hall of corridors curious about her language, cuz this is way more interesting than her beach.
I guess I’m supposed to just walk around in here… so I do.
It felt like searching. It felt like wonder and curiousity. It felt like an eons long journey in a way.
And then,
Suddenly, just before I turned my head a second ago… I saw some thing!
What.was.that!?
I go back… I had turned to the left, now I went back to my right… yes, this one, the longest corridor… so so long. And just as I turned back, Jessica said “You are Perfect”. This perfect storm turning me into this longest corridor, the thing I saw at the verrrrrry teeny end, met me. Instantly, a frikkin tidal wave with surges of sharp, shards of lighted glass, came RUSHING into my body… through my very eyes!
Big pieces of light-glass, small pieces, teeny pieces, medium pieces, all shapes, all sizes, and entirely charged with emotion somehow coming from inside of me to deeper inside of me. My eyes were blinking so quickly, I can’t even fake how fast they were blinking, and believe me, I have tried too many times, attempting to understand. My blink-speed and hardness were correlated to the size of the lighted-shard and the emotional intensity it walloped me with.
I am wailing… now
the complete UGLY cry, as Oprah calls it.
Tears pouring out in rivers, cries like I’ve never imagined, snot pooling, even some drool.
My body is now contorting and moving by itself without me doing anything. HOW? How is any of this happening?
I am absolutely mystified and curious and… still wailing… and mostly not scared, but sort of freaked out… and yet, a part of me knows, THIS IS GOOD. At some level it was beyond shockingly surprising and could never be known, as well as, completely known, simultaneously.
The shards keep coming… the pain keeps surging, rising and falling, the shards were entering my body, I contort somehow to the shape it needs to fit into its own placement, like putting lighted glass shard puzzle pieces into a 3D puzzle of me. Looking back, it was a sort of infusion processing happening.
There are no images, no memories, only the rawest expression of emotional pain, howling its way out of every nanometer of my very being.
Eyes still blinking like mad, so fast, so rapid, and my body literally moving as if I was being shot by a machine gun. I have grown to call this my “Machine Gun Awakening” moment. When I get a better name, it might change.
Eventually the surges slow down, the light-shard pieces become consistently smaller, less emotions are associated with each incoming shard… more space in between them now, smaller even yet, and then the pieces come to a rest. Finally.
A rest.
.
.
Parts of my mind were racing trying to figure it all out. Other parts were remembering what Jessica said about the physical reaction and knowing when I’d be done. I found myself wondering IF I was in fact done? Cuz damn son, that was a ride! Logic kicked in and told me, well if I had to ask, then I wasn’t, was I?
I rested more.
And waited.
Arms & Hands limp noodles in my lap.
Mind wide wide wiiiiide open… still in “state” as I learned meditation language later.
Calm.
Wordless space.
And then…
My eyes roll up behind my eyelids…slowly, very slowly… taking in the new scene in front, above, around to the right, down, and to the left… looking.all.around… my.self.
Really checking it out…
The brightest hot-white/whitest white, all fit together… no seams, no shards, no edges, nothing sharp, no charge…
Serene.
Clear.
Neutral here.
And then I knew I was “done”. Opening my depleted, absolutely raggedy andy doll body and eyes…
Jessica is there.
Someone new is now here too… someone I don’t know, never met, haven’t seen, and some way feel complete peace with.
It’s the purest parts… of me, now inhabiting this body.
I walked away from that 1hr appt, 3hrs later you guys.
I walked away knowing that “I’m a healer” and that one day I would be taught, officially.
My journey started that second… into all things Complementary and Alternative Medicine and hasn’t stopped. 10yrs after that moment, I found the energy medicine school where I have studied immersively for the last 9 years, as well as focused therapies including cranio-sacral therapy and sound/vibrational/frequency therapy. I’ve rec’d hundreds of healing sessions across multitudes of modalities, studied countless techniques, grown and opened up my own levels of awareness and intuition so much so that I now live my life intuitively.
AND
the newest discovery, that moment nearly 20 years ago continues to teach me… when I was 43, I was pondering IF and since that was a healing moment for me, what in the heck was I “healed” from? What were all these light-shards about really? All this emotional outpouring that occurred? For what? Why?
In that moment, I realized that I no longer allowed myself to continue the cycle of abuse against my own body. I seriously can’t believe it took 20 years to realize this.
I continue to consciously choose healing my physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, and intuitive bodies, every single day.
In 2017, I received a clairaudient message that told me
“INTUITIVE HUMAN IS THE WORK YOU WILL DO IN THE WORLD!”
And, so it is.
I take deep dives with intuitive humans across the globe,
excavating their radical intuitive experiences,
making sense where possible and accepting where not.
Discovering how intuition works for humanity so that we may normalize these experiences across the globe.
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